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“If it’s still in your mind, it is worth taking the risk.” -Paulo Coelho
I recently came across this quote that was tweeted by one of my friends and it immediately hit home. You see, I am at a place right now where most aspects of my life are, by regular standards, perfectly fine. Except for my ever non-existent love life, I have a loving family, several close friends and a well-established career.
I have been in the corporate world for 6 years now and as a matter of fact just landed a very lucrative job recently. I love this job, the company, and the boss and it pays really well. It is like I finally found my dream job, except that it is not exactly my dream job.
The quote reminded me again of something that’s always been in my head: I want to make it in showbusiness.
I thought I have given that dream up years ago convincing myself that it is not exactly the career path I am supposed to be taking given the fact that I have given it a shot once before.
But even though I try very hard to dismiss that longing, that discontentment where ever I am at the moment, it would always seem that it never goes away. I would always dream or daydream or fantasize about how awesome it would be like to be performing some place, some how, right now, all the time.
Lately, I have been toying with the idea of pursuing it for the second time, and this time around, it would be the kind of a “now or never” thing. I feel that I would have to let go of every thing, of the ideals, of the insecurities, of trying to control how life should turn out and just surrender myself to all possibilities (good or bad) to be able to realize this dream.
Meaning, I would have to give up this [professional] life I have built over the years in exchange for that chance to fulfill this dream. I know it won’t be easy but I believe that it’s the only way to make it happen.
I need to set aside the idea that there will always be that safety net of going back to the corporate world if things don’t work out [again]. I would have to convince myself that this is the only life I need to have in order to really live. It’s either have this life or don’t live at all.
I would need to tell myself that there’s no other way to live my life than to be performing. This, I think, is the philosophy, the conviction I didn’t have before that hindered my “success” at pursuing showbusiness. I wasn’t ready to give everything up to make it. I now realize that one cannot succeed at something when he’s just half committed to it.
Of course, it would take monumental guts to do this. I would have to be completely fearless and fully convinced, that no matter the outcome, it will all be all right in the end.
No ifs, no buts. Just do it. Stick with it. And keep doing it.
I know I can’t just drop everything and take that journey just like that. It would take some time to fully get into that “there’s no turning back” zone. But each and every day, the urge is getting stronger and stronger. And that’s good because that way, I am keeping the dream alive.
My initial plan is to save enough money first to support myself while aspiring to make it in showbusiness and most likely, by mid-next year, I would already be traveling to Los Angeles to do some professional training first and take it from there.
For now, I am convinced this is really what I wanna do. I know our minds change, but I’ll do everything I can to keep this dream more alive each day.