Gone astray. Blame college (or me).

I’ve always loved performing. In fact, it is my passion. The very thing that feeds my soul. I live and breathe it. I probably learned how to dance and sing before I could learn how to walk and talk. Since kindergarten until senior high school, I have been performing non-stop, all year round. I have also choreographed for some dance groups and singing quartets. As a matter of fact, I have been awarded best dancing pair, twice. In singing however, I haven’t been so lucky. I mean I can sing, but I am not the best. I have always considered myself as the *cough.cough* complete package. I can sing. I can dance. I can act. And I’m not bad looking either.

My dream job is to be a performer, an entertainer. When I get there, I won’t be working a day in my life. And that’s what I want. But things happen along the way. College happened. After I stepped out of high school, my focus was to get that degree as soon as possible and then I could pursue my dream after. But little did I know, fate has something else in store for me. Instead of my goal to finish college in 4 years, 3 1/2 years even, I ended up finishing it in *drum roll please* 7 1/2 years. Twice longer than my original plan!

Maybe it was my poor choices. I did not really know what I want to take. Growing up in a small province did not help either. I was so ignorant that there are courses outside science, medicine, engineering, information technology and law (you know the usual courses that most of us, especially parents think that will give you a bright and secure future). So, I’ve gone from taking computer science, to political science, to forestry and finally business administration.  I did not know that there were actually short-term specialized courses for the arts. Had I known then, I would have taken them along with my bachelor’s degree. I just found out about it now *slams head on the wall*. I know it’s not too late—it’s never too late. But boy, what a waste of time it was!

Now, I’m trying to refocus my attention to one thing and one thing alone: my dream. I’m taking it one step at a time. First, I am going to enrol at dance summer workshop. And I can’t wait! God knows how much I really miss it. In retrospect, maybe the reason why I always felt depressed is because I wasn’t doing what I’ve always wanted to do. So at least I already know what I really want to do. My hope is that I will become successful with my endeavour (InshaAllah).


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